Diagnosed with cancer, I had to decide whether to become angry and ask “why me” or to turn to my Heavenly Father and say, “Thy will be done. Please give me strength.” I chose the latter. I felt peace and comfort during my battle.
About a year ago I went on a walk around my neighborhood. I had not been feeling great, and I was having pain in my armpit. As I was walking, a voice came to my head saying, “You have cancer.” I thought I was just thinking dramatic things. So I prayed as I walked that if I had cancer, I would know without a doubt that I had it. I didn’t want to go to a doctor and just say “I had a thought that I had cancer. Can you test me?”
As soon as I got home, I found a lump. I called my doctor and told her about the lump, and the pain I was having. She didn’t even ask to meet with me—she sent me straight to a hospital for testing. Sure enough, I had cancer. It was devastating and really scary. When you’re first diagnosed, they don’t tell you much about what stage it is, so it’s easy for your mind to wander. All I knew was that I had a large tumor. Immediately, I turned to my Heavenly Father for help and support, and I just remember feeling peace throughout my entire battle with cancer. It turned out that I had stage 2b cancer. That means that it was a large-sized tumor, but I was very blessed and caught it before it spread to my lymph nodes and body.
It was a great relief to finally know the staging and come up with a plan. I was to go through five months of chemo and about two months of radiation, with a couple of surgeries between and after. It has been the most difficult time of my life. During difficult times you have two choices: you can either become angry and ask “why me” or you can turn to your Heavenly Father and say “thy will be done. Please give me strength.” I chose the latter. This choice brought peace and comfort during my battle.
Instead of asking “why me,” I found things to be grateful for. I was grateful it was me going through this trial and not any of my young children. I was grateful it was me and not my husband. I was grateful for the friends I made that came and lifted us up. Most of all I was thankful that I had the ability to see God’s hands helping us throughout the entire process. I am thankful that I went through cancer, not because it was easy, but because it was the most difficult thing to go through, and I saw miracles and blessings in my home. It was one of the most uplifting times of my life.
One of the ways we saw God’s hand during this battle was regarding my husband’s job. A job opportunity opened up at his company, and it was a job we were hopeful he’d get, especially with the medical bills that come with cancer. Well, he didn’t get the job, and was disappointed. As a result, he was able to come to every chemo appointment with me and work from anywhere with the current job he had. He was also able to be there and care for me and our three daughters during the many surgeries I had.
As soon as I was finished with chemo, a new opening for the same job opened up! He got the job. It’s amazing how Heavenly Father knows exactly how things need to work out best for us. If Alan had received the job earlier he wouldn’t have been there as much for us, and as it is with learning any new job, it would have been stressful trying to learn a new job while going through what we went through.
Two weeks ago I had my final surgery for my cancer. I’m now in remission. I’m looking forward to a new year where my focus can be recovering and healing from what my body has been through.
Heavenly Father is always there for us, and I challenge all of you to turn to Him especially in times of difficulty, and see even the little ways He is there guiding and carrying us through them.
If you would like to reach out to Jessica directly for support or to hear more about her story you can email her at jessicahanson140@gmail.com.